What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness | Robert Waldinger


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What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness | Robert Waldinger

What keeps us happy and healthy as we go through life? If you think it's fame and money, you're not alone – but, according to psychiatrist Robert Waldinger, you're mistaken. As the director of 75-year-old study on adult development, Waldinger has unprecedented access to data on true happiness and satisfaction. In this talk, he shares three important lessons learned from the study as well as some practical, old-as-the-hills wisdom on how to build a fulfilling, long life. TEDTalks is a daily video podcast of the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world's leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less). Look for talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and much more. Find closed captions and translated subtitles in many languages at Follow TED news on Twitter: Like TED on Facebook: Subscribe to our channel:

Comments to the video: What makes a good life? Lessons from the longest study on happiness | Robert Waldinger

beedee211 8 hours ago
As someone with social anxiety, this kills to watch. I dream that I can converse and connect with others but there's just a mental block and its too hard.
Kareem Magdy 1 day ago
Islam and prophet Mohamed said it earlier. From 1436 years. Relationships: Relationships with your big family, friends, ascendants and descendants.
游良福 1 day ago
The research in this video should be: Dev Psychol. 2016 Mar;52(3):496-508. doi: 10.1037/a0039875. Epub 2015 Nov 9. Midlife Eriksonian psychosocial development: Setting the stage for late-life cognitive and emotional health. Full paper: Relatived research: Expression profiles of loneliness-associated genes for survival prediction in cancer patients. Conclusion:Expression of loneliness-associated genes are related to survival time of cancer patients.
Ben Refoc 2 days ago
not having a black single mom.
ibycus314 3 days ago
I’d like to know more about the data analysis. Not that I don’t believe the results, but rather with tens of thousands of pages to go through, I suspect that one could trace a line and draw almost any conclusion.
Nadine Edwards 3 days ago
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Ali Ali 5 days ago
He's right but under one condition that if you can be totally present and be mostly with people whom really spark your life then magic will happen to you by the law of nature that Allah put in his creation's energy , you'll be bursting with real happiness that would fuel you to ninety years old at ease
King Tetsumaki 5 days ago
All relationships I've had has been extremely stressful. I cut off everyone in my life and had nothing but peaceful bliss. That was 10 years ago.
sih1688 6 days ago
Good financial standing (provide good life) throught out your life.
pretty spicy 7 days ago
This made me cry. I realized that I would never be happy.
bianca ok 7 days ago
everyone here is superficial how am i supposed to develop long lasting relationships
Akancha Chari 9 days ago
amazing
Miloš 9 days ago
This is such a bullshit way to present these conclusions as to have good connections you need money. Maybe not billions, but enough so you don't ever have to worry. Otherwise, it eats at you when life comes knocking down, and you can't maintain healthy relationships.
Lucas Santos 10 days ago
Excellent speaker
Lucas Santos 10 days ago
Excellent speaker
Alex Starreveld 10 days ago
as someone with aspergers, looks like i'm dying sooner. THANK GOD!!!
BRUCE Wayne 10 days ago
Heart breaking for Introverts.
Sandy Cardenas 10 days ago
Its all about networking, quality over quantity. You need people around you, that can help you get ahead in life. Not bring you down.
Christine Crozet 10 days ago
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Invader 71 11 days ago
I don’t mind being in a quality partnership but very happy alone right now~
healthy body, healthy mind 11 days ago
I love your approach of looking at things, thank you for sharing!
Hello Happiness 12 days ago
The number of good friends, lovely family and community connections that I have means *I am never going to die.* YAY!!!! I am so glad I invested in all the right people. Thanking my stars. :-)
Gonzalo Fernández 12 days ago
That's really awesome.
Pratik Gautam 12 days ago
Started from 6:10
Christie Agatha 12 days ago
Although shorter life , it may be better than another one
Lorenzo Alexander 13 days ago
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Demasturbot 13 days ago
He presented us with no proof. I would love to see the exact data rather than you just have to be in a good relationship with your wife and family.
Japusa 14 days ago
thank you
TEH Cs 15 days ago
I really go away with that man. For me, the reason why big and close relationships make the life easy and secure is that we can share our fears with our relative and prevent it from destroying ourselves, also being with supportive people make the problems have no effects wich mean happiness is made up of the safety and sharing issues with other so that every thing is comfortable. Sorry for bad English
Sammy James 15 days ago
This is so true. For my opinion.we need a relationship with God then only our relationship will be blessed.Thats make us Happier. In the other hand.Its not the quantity of years we live make us happy but the quality of our life that we spend and share with God and other people.that even makes life worth to live.
Ayuwdisney Channel 15 days ago
Amazing :') Im crying watching this video :') Thank you so much Sir. Robert Waldinger For your Information and advice for all of us 🙏🙏 Human are Beautiful. But what make them not Beautiful because their attitude. I think every person can change If they want to change and keep always Try to be Better person. We live in This world together, How Beautiful If all of people Rise up together and Make this world Peace not only because One person but because All people in this World who bring The Peace. Amen.
Ezequiel 15 days ago
good talk! i got the feels, this gives me lots of hope thank you. I finally opened up to my family this thanksgiving and well how could i have though the didnt love me. Everyone gave me a hug and assured me that they are here and always have loved me. Depression is hard to shake, i never had money and was raised by a single mother. WE CAN DO IT!!! @wecan
Matt Price 15 days ago
Human beings are the only species who have to pay money to live on the earth
Matt Price 15 days ago
There’s no temporary ill in life a good masturbation can’t solve.
Petal 16 days ago
I believe Japanese have long life but most of them are single and a recent study said Nearly 1 in 4 men and 1 in 7 women in Japan were yet to be married at age 50 in 2015 in a clear sign that Japanese are increasingly shying away from tying the knot,
karaqi4 17 days ago
Solid good relationships are the happiness of this life. When you know you belong there, you're accepted and secure for life in your family and community. This allows us to be mentally healthy and emotionally stable. I love that feeling, it's the best <3
foster scoot 17 days ago
well. yes and no. if the system if making 100% of humans slaves. work day and night. want it or not. find money. the objective of humans.now. who cares. about this study. what about been a Monk ?. what about. isolation makes you find your self. and delete all human concepts and start new unimaginable ideas ?. ;;. TEDS talks has become like APPLE talks. one single door at the end for all.
Subrat Deo 18 days ago
get dog,cat, parrot
Susan Jamison 18 days ago
This study is only included men so the data is not applicable to women.
Sarah S 18 days ago
The companion robots 🤖 are on the horizon!
Lev Arhipov 19 days ago
then what to do, to find such relationship, such partner and friends? how can you achieve it by your wish? I'm afraid it depends on luck and random events, unfortunately becoming rich or famous is easier to manage
je an 19 days ago
Luv it!!!!
Madronaxyz 19 days ago
As usual, a white man is making sweeping conclusions from research that covers less than 40% of the population. This is typical of medical research and has led to the under-recognition and mistreatment of patients who are not white males.
3506Dodge 20 days ago
but people like byron katie and eckhart tolle tell us we don't need others to be happy. They say that happiness comes from within. Hmmm.which is it?
3506Dodge 20 days ago
So they had wives. Is that what made them hapy?
karan verma 20 days ago
Thank god for making my life short. Now feeling sad.
Yogik Swara 20 days ago
inspired feeling that i had
Space Monkey 20 days ago
Skating and mating. drinking and driving
The MOTION 20 days ago
Awesome video
المدرسة 20 days ago
Cidinha Aggio 20 days ago
Maravilhoso!!!!
Tio lolo 21 days ago
ESTUDIEN ESTA PVTOS :v
Andella Hypolite 21 days ago
Who got the joke at 5:22? Can you explain.
Thao 21 days ago
Keep good relationship with God and Universe
Stu 21 days ago
The introverts are fucked according to this. Goody.
Luckydog Sanctuary 21 days ago
just get a dog
Jay Schwartz 22 days ago
i'll take the money and the fame.
eric heine 22 days ago
Not Justa pasta, it's awesome it's a sauce and the cheese. The wine and the women. Children with your last name. Peaceful sleep. Iron American Dream on YouTube Share it. Take a ride across the promised land. Ride a Harley.
quynh nhu 23 days ago
Good relationships :)
weallarethedead 23 days ago
loneliness doesn't kill, nor does it has negative impact on our health. It is the lack of understanding what we do to compensate for that loneliness and sense of directionlessness that mostly has negative impact on our health.
joel sach 25 days ago
im dead then i guess
Cora Zon 26 days ago
Okay so then what do you so if your family is toxic, WTF do you just lose, you just have to accept it, Like don't get me wrong it was a beautiful speech, But not everyones family members are open to speaking to you and connecting SO THEN what are you supposed to do, JUST be sad.
Dark Soul 27 days ago
But loneliness can be a choice. And it makes you happier, healthier, and keeps harm away from you 😊
Antonio Martin 27 days ago
BEFORE THIS VIDEO I HAD NOW FRIENDS. NOW I AM COMMITED TO MAKE CONNECTIONS. I JOINED A MENS GROUP YESTERDAY!
lilly bloom 27 days ago
I assume Waldinger is an atheist. For a group of 20 interviewed over 75 healthy, happy people who were over 95 and lived from the US to Europe to South Africa to Australia to Russia , and each one of them said that having a close relationship with God, believing in God, or having faith in Christ helped them maintain a good, positive attitude, and most especially helped them through the hard times that life brings about. Yet, Waldinger mentions not one word about God or faith. So, we have to figure that he is an atheist with an agenda, because surely a few out of the hundreds in this study would have mentioned something similar to the more than 75 people we interviewed regarding how they lived so long, were so healthy, how they kept such good attitudes, and how they stayed happy. Another constant was that none of them feared death. Some even looked forward to it, believing they would see their loved ones. Others said they looked forward to seeing Jesus in person. Waldinger obviously skewers what most people say regarding these subjects, because he is a humanist and an atheist with an agenda.
Hate At Chee 28 days ago
Good thing they didn't ask me about my major life goals. that segment of the speech would have ended with And one millennial said he wanted to die before reaching the age of 30 as his major life goal.
Joel Falla 28 days ago
Honestly, happiness is a farce. Life is suffering and, whatever happiness is, it can only be gained through picking up your suffering and genuinely, courageously, and fearlessly being content with it — learning to mold it. This, I promise you, can only be done with a ferocious love of God. Because why else on Earth would anyone be motivated to do literally anything if it didn’t have a transcendent end?
AlternativEdit 28 days ago
That feeling when you are introvert
vee ro 28 days ago
why dont they study women?!
Zes 28 days ago
wrong, idts. can succeed, infinitely happy, strongx nmw. not related to that, not needy idts.
Shaahin 1 month ago
The death of Ivan Ilyich
stardappledgreen 1 month ago
I'd rather be alone than live with people I don't like. And I'd rather be with people I like (most of the time) than alone. For some, solitude is healthier and better than spending time around people you don't fit in with, who just make you miserable and kill your self-esteem
Ten Beh 1 month ago
And you forgot that friend zone will also shorten our lives too! ifeelyouman
Graham Graves 1 month ago
RIP Autistic People
Kirk Bushell 1 month ago
6 mins about the study itself. Skip to half-way.
BENCHOHRA ZIDELKHIR 1 month ago
thank you very much
Sabeer V 1 month ago
AL BAQARA: 261 *The similitude of those who spend their wealth in the way of Lord Allah is that of a grain which sprouts into 7 ears, in each ear having 100 grains; Lord Allah multiplies things for anyone whom He wishes, and Allah is Wide-knower.*  Here one gets 700 grains from a single seed. The next year he will get at least 70,000 grains as seeds. After some years, the crops of that area will be from that single seed. There are 1000 communities of creatures living here, out of which 400 are living on Earth while the rest 600 are living in the water as explained in the verse 6: 38. Each of them are praying and glorifying the Lord as told in the verses 17: 44 and 24: 41. So the odd believer will do all his deeds with an intention to get the reward in the Hereafter multiplied. Since the believer is living under the Light—Adhikr, he will leave out the footprints to his family and to others behind him which will be beneficial for the whole communities of Lord’s creatures testifying the verses 36: 12; 75: 13 and 82: 5.The verse 24: 30 ends as: Indeed Lord is acquainted with what they are producing. And the verse 29: 45 ends as: And Lord is knowing what you are producing. In both these verses instead of saying “they are doing” and “you are doing”, it is said “they are producing” and “you are producing”. That means everyone will be rewarded not only for his own deeds but also for the heritage (good or bad) he left behind. The hypocrites and their blind followers should have to bear the burden of the difficulties suffered by the creatures all over the world as told in the verses 20: 99-100 and 33: 72-73. It is told in the verse 40: 40 that whoever does an evil thing, he will not be rewarded except similar to it; and whoever does a righteous deed from male or female, and he is a believer, then such will be entered in the paradise, they will be provided sustenance in it without measure. See the explanation 2: 62; 112 and 200-202. ANNISA’: 85 *Anyone who intercedes a good intercession, he has a share in it; while anyone who intercedes a bad intercession, he will have a share in its burden, and Lord Allah is overseeing upon each and everything.*  Adhikr is the Criterion and the Balance to distinguish the good and bad. So the believer testifies all the 40 names of It. He also advises the mankind to utilize It for wiping out Satan’s footsteps for forming harmony of mankind with peace and tranquility considering It as the Balance and Trust to keep the Universe in its equilibrium. He does and encourages to do organic farming as well as planting trees which are beneficial for 1000 communities of Lord’s creatures so that he will receive a portion of the rewards from the prayers and glorifications of them testifying the verses 17: 44 and 24: 41. He also does Jihad with Lord’s Book Adhikr against the terrorists and hypocrites, and conveys Adhikr to entire Worlds for helping others to convert their offences happened in their ignorant period into good deeds as told in the verse 25: 68-70. By taking copies of Adhikr- and translating It into different languages, he tries to postpone the dateline of Earth’s Pole-shift and the arrival of Antichrist.  The hypocrites are teaching mankind that the name of Lord’s Book is ‘Qur’an’ and It is meant for the people during Prophet’s time. Thus, they are knowingly encouraging the people to follow the ‘books of deeds’ written by the 29 pseudo-prophets. They also give false hope to their followers saying that ‘you follow us, we will carry your burden on the Day of Judgment’ as told in the verses 16: 24-25 and 29: 12-13. But the fact is that without being a believer with Adhikr, no appeal will be responded, nor any deed will be accepted as told being the explanation of the verse 2: 186. They also falsely teach the people that mere reading of Qur’an itself will be rewarded since the verses like “Alif-Lam-Meem” and “Ayin-Seen-Qaaf” are not having meaning. By this they are rejecting prophet’s teaching that whoever reads the Qur’an without knowing Its content (Fajir) are the worst among the mankind. The Best Interpretation of the Lord’s Book—Adhikr—is explaining 6236 verses including “Alif-Lam-Meem” and “Ayin-Seen-Qaaf very clearly. See the explanation 2: 261; 3: 138 and 4: 64. (These two verses and their explanations are taken from Adhikr-the Best Interpretation of Lord’s Book. Whoever wants to know more can visit the site HYPERLINK Adhikr is available in Arabic and Malayalam languages also.
Briddy Hll 1 month ago
If You have food in your tummy have water to drink and some where safe to sleep and keep yourself busy, every thing else is a luxury
Briddy Hll 1 month ago
Get rich. my employer a Lady who was a millionair , said to me one day That she was bored. bored i exclaimed. she explained she had nothing to look forward to. I said you have race horses boats a roller a merc etc, she said you young man look forward to Birthdays Christmas weddings partys, I do not have to wait for any thing. presents, I just buy what i want when I want, she said she was always buying trying to be happy. I said I was content with what I had, there you are says the boss, you have already found it, I do not know what it is she said, beg parden Mam it`s call CONTENTMENT I am happy with what I have, would not say no to a new spade though.
Briddy Hll 1 month ago
society and goverments has taken the life out of living. 80 years ago or there abouts. humans would go about, gleening, collecting firewood, picking berrys fruit etc etc oh the joy when the shed and store were filled, all the happiness and laughter when doing so. just some of the things that made us happy, now alas all gone. women now shop instead of gleening. gathering of a sort. while men watch sport on tv making them obese. now we have rubbish plastics every where. I could go on and on but you get the message...think about it. that world has gone.
Ankit Kumain 1 month ago
His voice is amazing I can listen him for an hour.
Somethingsgonnabe Wrong 1 month ago
Mercedes Fernández 1 month ago
Why weren't women included in such an important study?
Ayman Al_Jahwari 1 month ago
Help people and you will be very happy
aaron laluzerne 1 month ago
To quote George Washington: It is better to be alone then it is to be with bad company.
ChaotiX Trekker 1 month ago
History has one proof: wealth = longer life. Happiness doesn't equate into longer life; money does. The rich will always outlive the poor.
Sarah Smith 1 month ago
Would never trust anything from Harvard, Yale etc. All agenda driven.
Trevor Lewan 1 month ago
Good close relationships ae? So why is everyone starting to talk about the Bible and God and substituting the real message of this video with a message about God? He didn't say anything about God on this video!!!!
Juliana Marcelino B. 1 month ago
Shows me how lonely I am
Кристина Боброва 1 month ago
That’s why women lives longer that man
Portside Starboard 1 month ago
The best quality relationship you can have is with god. With him you will never feel lonely, you will never feel disappointed, you will never feel abandoned.etc, things that can happen in every other relationship. Strengthening your relationship with god is the only source of unending happiness.
AbDoU ReY 1 month ago
Whoever fears his Lord and maintains family ties, his life will be prolonged, his wealth will be enriched, and his family will love him
AbDoU ReY 1 month ago
قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم: يقول الله تعالى: صلوا ارحامكم فانه ابقى لكم في الحياة الدنيا، وخير لكم في آخرتكم
Problem Solved 1 month ago
HER IS A BRIEF ABOUT HOW TO BE HAPPY IN YOUR LIFE-
Connor Hearld 1 month ago
This is incredibly heart warming.
Bob Crunch 1 month ago
Get rich and embrace socialism??? This summarizes how screwed up Millennials are.
Andrey Starostin 1 month ago
Every day we need to step back and express thanks. Be thankful and feel fulfilled. Happiness will come with love.
رياض الصالحين 1 month ago
I think that the greatest thing have been heard of TED